These are selected quotes from my new novel Stella Maris, available in paperback and on Kindle!
Think of them as mini excerpts!
“How the fuck do you remember my birthday?”
“It’s still etched on the one brain cell I didn’t burn out,” said Lori as she tapped the side of her head with her index finger.
“How’s it goin’ today?”
“Just that usual bottom static on a couple of channels. That’s about it.”
“Static butts?” asked Chip.
“The bottom of the screen you perv.”
“Hey, I’m a professional perv. I get a pass!”
“Well, you don’t even look thirty,” said Sixer with a smile.
“Oh hell yeah she does,” spoke up Harp, “She looks like she’s thirty five!”
“Stop that!” said Colleen as she playfully punched Harp in the arm. “That’s mean!”
“Hey Skye,” said Harp, “you can start looking for those young guys who want a MILF!”
“Can I be a MILF if I don’t have any kids?” asked Skye.
“You guys aren’t gonna start singing Waiting Room, are you?”
Skye shook her head. “No, no. Not gonna sing it.”
“We won’t sing it if you give us five dollars.”
“Someone lost a buncha vibrators.”
“Those don’t work anymore,” shouted Chip from the back.
“Damn. What kinda shoots are ya doin’ if you keep breaking this many vibrators?”
“Damn Skye. You fucked her up.”
“What was I supposed to do? She was getting out of hand.”
“Sure, but did you have to rearrange her face?”
Skye put down her beer and turned towards Cringer. “Hey, if someone hits you, you either run or you fight. You just don’t stand there with a dumb look on your face holding your finger up in the air.”
“In high school. I owned my own car. Most of my friends back then had licenses to drive, but they had to beg their parents to borrow a car, which they almost never got. I had a big ass fucked up Lincoln Continental that my grandparents gave me so I never had to ask. My nickname back then was ‘Can I have a ride?’”
“He has a nipple thing,” said Skye as she got down on the floor to look under the bed.
“Nipple thing?”
“Yeah. You can’t mess with his nipples unless you grab them or bite them kinda hard. He doesn’t like it if you just gently brush them.”
“What?”
“He gets really upset if you don’t touch his nipples correctly.”
“Shouldn’t you guys be at the club by now?” asked Betts.
“Hell naw,” said Cringer. “Those punks always show up late anyways. We just need to be there right before we go on.”
“Jason’s a singer anyways,” said Teresa. “Those fuckers never haul equipment,” she added with a grin.
“Hey, I do so help!” protested Jason.
“With those guns you better,” said Skye as she playfully punched Jason in the arm.
“Quit punching me,” said Jason.
“That’s the worst part, when you can’t remember their name. It’s not the part about you got stinkin’ drunk and went home with someone you barely know, or whatever deviant sex acts you did the night before, or that you have no idea which city you’re in, much less whose house you’re waking up in, it’s the not remembering their name. That somehow always ends up being the worst part.”
“Too true. It’s so embarrassing. It’s like, ‘Yeah I had my face crammed up against your genitals for half an hour last night but I don’t remember your name.’”
“When I was their age I was snorting speed off of my partner’s genitals. What are these fuck ups doing?”
Gil put his arm around Skye. “You are a good friend, lovely lady.”
“Did you just call me a lady?”
“Watch it Gil,” said Jake-o. “She gonna punch you.”
Gil took back his arm. “Is that a threat or a promise?”
“Yes!” said Skye. “Now I’m buyin’ Bonn’s pint. Who’s drinkin’ it?”
“I got other problems than lesbians with crappy pickup lines. I really do.”
“Holy shit though, that was a trip,” said Skye as she walked up to Rails.
“What?”
“Gabriella. The last time I saw her she was an obnoxious little six year old.”
Rails looked over at Gabriella and her crew. “It is a trip. I still want to see the six year old, but now…”
“That shit makes me feel old.”
“Wait ’til she has kids of her own. Then you’ll feel like someone’s grandma.”
“Fuck.” Skye looked over at Gabriella. “I am literally old enough to be her mother.”
“If you got knocked up at fourteen, yeah. Which has happened around here a few times.”
“Here you go sweet thing,” said the man as he gave Colleen a Snickers bar.
“Sweet thing?” said Colleen. “I don’t know whether to slap you or kiss you!”
“Or both,” said Skye.
“Both both!” said the man as he jumped quickly up and down.
“Yeah, I had way too much beer and whiskey and some coke. I barely even remember what happened.”
“Fuck Skye, you oughta know better than that. You do too much coke and whiskey and you could end up fucking a horse.”
“Who’s Bonn?” asked one of the metal women.
“Our friend Bonn who passed on last week. This was his favorite bar and that was his favorite song.”
“You mean to tell me this guy’s dead and buried,” said Skye, “and he’s still causing a ruckus at the pub?”
“I dunno. I can ask around, but I ain’t droppin’ everything and looking for some sketched out tweaker who may or may not be in trouble, even if she used to be my best friend. I practically killed myself looking for that asshole Alex when she disappeared, and I drove all over creation on the off chance I might find my ex in one big city after another. Those kinda searches never go nowhere. I’m done chasin’ after fuck ups who don’t care enough to at least text or call somebody to let us know they aren’t dying in a ditch somewheres.”
“The only reason all men haven’t been wiped out in a total gender race war is because our culture has somehow convinced women that they aren’t capable of the same kind of rage and violence as men. They are. Maybe even more so because they have a lot more to be pissed off about.”
Skye leaned closer to Shane. “So if he was such a monumental fuck up that drove everyone up the wall, why you writin’ to him?”
Shane held up his block and looked at it. “’Cause I know no one else is writin’ to him, and he did all those messed up things because he got fucked over by just about everyone he knew. His family, his schoolmates, all of his evil exes, and alla that shit when he was young. That’s what fucked him up. That’s why he was such a wild asshole.” Shane turned to Skye. “If he hadn’t a’ checked out they would have eventually kicked him out of the gang. They wouldn’t have had a choice. Even so, I just thought someone should let him know that someone’s thinking about him. Sometimes you gotta give some cred to people who weren’t necessarily your favorites, or who weren’t your closest buds. You know.”
Stella Maris is the sequel to my previous novel. Even though it can be read by itself, check out what Skye was up to before her adventures in Stella Maris!
https://www.amazon.com/What-Hell-Ever-Happened-Rozhenko-ebook/dp/B08WC4DK6G/
Wow… these quotes make this novel sounds cool and interesting to read. And I like the cover design. So sexy!